Voice – Expression of Personality

In this e-book, you will learn:

Posture and Lung Potential
Finding Your Natural Pitch
The Voice and Its Resonance Chambers
Exercises

We, author Anja Gnägy-Auweiler and publisher Stephan Landsiedel, wish you a great time reading and trying these out!

Introduction

How we affect others and how they respond to us depends not just on our personality or appearance, but also on our voice. It reveals our feelings and intentions.

Our listeners react to our voice in fractions of a second and unconsciously form an opinion about us and our character. So, the first audible impression is crucial.

Maybe you’ve experienced attending a seminar and finding it hard to follow the lecturer. Possibly the content is too dry, or maybe the speaker’s voice just doesn’t resonate. Some voices are too high-pitched and squeaky, others are too low. Perhaps the speaker talks too fast, or drags on too slowly, causing you to tune out or glance at the clock.

On the other hand, you might have experienced seminars where you remain fully engaged. The speaker’s voice sounds pleasant, they can convey content vividly, and quickly establish good rapport with you and the group. You hang on their every word, practically “absorbing” what they say.

Both experiences have happened to me and got me thinking more about the human voice.

Let’s consider the role of voice in communication. It’s far more significant than commonly assumed. Only about 7–10% is conveyed by the spoken words; the remaining 90% is conveyed through voice (tonality) and body language. So it strongly depends how we speak and emphasize our sentences. Indeed, each person’s voice has a unique timbre, but it also varies day by day. One can hear sadness, anger, joy, or excitement. Depending on our mood, tension in the vocal cords changes how we sound.

For instance, if we’re sad or depressed, both our body and our vocal folds lose tension, making our voice sound subdued or breathy, less present. Conversely, if we’re happy, we typically have a brighter, clearer voice. Our body and vocal folds carry more tension.

It’s enough to answer the phone with a single “hello,” and people can sense whether we’re in a good or bad mood. Or we say a certain sentence that, depending on emphasis, might come across differently, even though we used the exact same words. All of that shapes how listeners perceive us.

The aim is to get the vocal folds to vibrate maximally with as little effort and breath pressure as possible.

“Every sound issuing from a full soul is an effective action.”

– Lorenz Kellner (1811–1892), German Catholic educator

So discover your own voice, which will help you establish quick and strong rapport with your listeners. Train it so that both your words and their tone (pitch, volume, timbre) are clear and easy to follow.

Luckily, the voice is trainable. Of course it doesn’t happen overnight. It’s like with sports: To become good, you need consistent practice so that your vocal cords learn this new pattern. Even once you’ve acquired a new vocal skill, it might feel strange or artificial at first. But it would be worse to keep incorrect vocal habits, which might lead in the long run to hoarseness or recurring throat problems. The first step is about how you breathe.

To produce any sound at all, we need to breathe— crucial both for living and for speaking. But crucially, how do we breathe so as to produce a full voice, a good mental state, and maintain health? Our modern, sedentary lifestyles sometimes cause us to lose efficient breathing techniques we once naturally had. Some of us must consciously re-learn them.

First, it’s worthwhile to find out how you normally breathe. Are you a “high” breather, or a “deep” breather? You can do a small exercise alone or with a partner:

Take several slow, deep breaths. Check or have a partner check whether your shoulders rise as you inhale. If so, you’re a “high” breather, inhaling mostly into the top of your lungs. If your belly moves outward when exhaling, and inward when inhaling, that’s deeper breathing.

Neither is “wrong” or “right,” but note that we were all born breathing deeply. That’s how we breathe in our sleep or when we relax. It follows that deep breathing helps us achieve the correct tone or better exploit our resonance chambers.

Posture and Lung Potential

Another factor is posture and how thoroughly we fill our lungs. If we’re slumped at a desk, that can hamper lung expansion. If we mostly do shallow chest breathing (“high” breathing), we strain our vocal cords. This can make our voice sound forced or tense. Conversely, “belly breathing” is best. The diaphragm is pulled downwards by the abdominal muscles as we inhale, letting air fill the lungs evenly and the back get some support.

Exercise: Unsure where your diaphragm is? Place your hand where your ribs meet your sternum. Now cough lightly and see how the diaphragm “jumps” forward.

When we train belly breathing, we can try the candle test: Light a candle and hold it in front of your mouth while speaking or singing. If the flame doesn’t flicker, it means you’re transforming the exhaled air into resonant sound energy instead of blowing it outward.

A skill that needs more than just two ears

– Peter Amendt (*1944), Franciscan author

As mentioned, only 7–10% of communication is the words themselves; tonality (voice) and body language convey about 90%. Depending on vocal qualities, the same sentence may come across comedic, affectionate, or something else. We all strive to interpret events and find meaning.

If someone tells a story in a cold, unemotional voice, we busy ourselves trying to glean its significance—and in the process, we miss further remarks. Similarly, if a voice is hoarse, pitched too high or low, we unconsciously “diagnose” it. Before long, we’re overloaded and tune out.

Therefore, “listening” is an art. We need to practice daily, just like driving a car, until it’s second nature. The better we coordinate our voice and body signals, the less distraction we inflict on our audience.

Voices are audible moods

– Andreas Tenzer (*1954), German philosopher & educator

Natural Pitch

Why do some voices sound so pleasant, instantly making the person seem likeable? The secret is that they speak at their “indifference range,” i.e. their natural pitch. This is in the lower third of our vocal range, letting us speak with minimal strain and maximum resonance and brightness.

Everyone has such a pitch where speaking (loud or soft) is easy. Typically, we drift away from it only temporarily. Interestingly, many women (and men) slip into a high pitch when stressed or angry: vocal folds are tensed. Even everyday posture might keep us from speaking at the correct pitch. Over time, a mismatch can cause tension, which we inadvertently transmit to listeners.

I recall discovering my own “full-throated” natural pitch. It was surprisingly forceful. I needed time to get used to it. But it’s a powerful, helpful skill — for instance, to be clearly heard in a noisy bar or to approach a salary negotiation.

Let your “natural pitch” also serve as a stress gauge: Our voice creeps higher under stress. If you notice that, consciously shift back to your natural pitch. It helps reduce stress.

Finding Your Natural Pitch

There are various methods. A common method uses the agreeing “Mhhh.”

Stand or sit upright.
Repeat a moderately loud “Mhhh” multiple times.
The initial prolonged “Mhhh” typically corresponds to your indifference pitch.
After some practice, add a number or short sentence. Check that you remain in that pitch. Possibly it sounds bigger or more resonant than you’re used to.

If you do it with a partner, they can verify if you stay in pitch. Or do it alone: first produce a few “Mhhh” to re-center. That’s also useful right before you speak or present.

Your goal is to store that pitch in your “vocal memory.”

The Voice and Its Resonators

Exhaling air is the basis of any sound. For the sound to be audible, we need a “speaker box,” as in music. Our mouth, nasal cavity, and throat act as resonators, shaping our unique vocal timbre. The entire body can also resonate, e.g. if we scream or sing loudly.

Some exercises to detect your resonators:

Hum “m.” Usually the tongue rests loosely. Now place the tongue against the palate, then near the mouth floor, noticing how each changes the hum.
Hum an “m” vigorously while altering facial expression from sad to smiling, hearing how the pitch changes if you raise the soft palate by smiling.
For warmth and fullness in your voice, do deep breathing. While counting or speaking in your natural pitch, note vibrations in the chest, belly, or back.
Try bouncing while humming vowels, e.g. “u” to encourage abdominal breathing, “o” for a different register. You’ll sense where these resonate in your body.

Practicing these daily can dramatically improve your voice. Once we harness posture, deep breathing, and the natural pitch, we project a clearer, more pleasant sound.

Who knows, you may find yourself wondering why you didn’t begin voice training sooner!

References

Katja Dyckhoff & Thomas Westerhausen: Stimme – Instrument des Erfolges [Voice – Instrument of Success]

About the Author: Anja Gnägy-Auweiler (born 1965), married, two children, NLP Master Trainer, Systemic Consultant, Coach

I grew up in a very talkative family, discovering early on that different perspectives exist, fueling my curiosity about people, language, and thinking. My greatest driver is curiosity. It opens many doors, helps me see from multiple angles, and leads me to think systemically.

NLP is my greatest passion. It lets me communicate with others even more effectively and is truly practical for everyday life.

“Every soul belongs to a different world.” — Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844–1900), German philosopher, essayist, poet, writer